Even people who have deep functional or technical skills may be ineffective at building and maintaining effective relationships. As a result, they are profoundly unhappy. It is no surprise that many people seek personal coaching for improving one or more meaningful relationships.
Our approach to coaching and training rests on a powerful framework based on a new way of understanding ourselves and how we actually produce the results we obtain in our lives. Our unique and proven methodologies have the predictable effect of opening new possibilities leading to new actions and truly new, unprecedented results.
Most of our relationships are conversational, rather than physical. When you change your conversations with your son, your mother-in-law and your sales manager - over time, you will change your relationship with your son, your mother-in-law and your sales manager.
The quality of our relationships is deeply impacted by our listening. Listening is active interpretation, very unique to each person and dramatically impacted by each person's mood, beliefs, life experiences and standards. Listening is not passive receipt of objective information! Human communication is all about interpretation - not direct brain-to-brain information transfers!
Many people operate with an illusion that everyone sees things the way they do. So, what happens when we have disagreements or difficulties with someone? We quickly ascribe ill intentions to them. In reality, the other person's intentions are just fine; they simply perceive the same situation or issue from different perspectives.
Stereotyping has been, and continues to be, a fascinating psychological phenomenon. According to Stewart (2012),
Scholars use the term totalize to describe communication that emphasizes one aspect of a person above all others. When someone totalizes, he or she acts as if a single facet of an individual is the totality of that person or as if that single aspect is all that's important about the person (p. 180).
Given this perspective, the question must be posed, can an individual's personality and/or character be authentically totalized in a single aspect? From this writer's perspective, this is a rhetorical question which draws the immediate response of an emphatic, no! Interestingly, Stewart (2012) cites psychologist Gordon Allport who contends that "Stereotyping and prejudice grow out of normal-not deviant or unusual-cognitive activities" (p. 181) and "identified classification and generalization as commonplace mental activities than can foster stereotypes and prejudice" (p. 181).